An angel - in human form.

As of 8 months ago; I had no love for God. I didn't even know what the love of God could do. I was so ignorant to the subject of God that I actually believed that something as special as myself and everyone around me could be created by "science." At the time, I was in my second high school, North Tonawanda Senior High School. I was dealing with some severe issues - I didn't trust any ones intentions, because up until then, nobody could handle me as a person. I decided that if not even my own parents could care enough about me to tell me about it, then how could someone I've never seen or known? Then I had an experience, one that changed my whole life. Turned my entire world upside down. It was my Jesus, my saviour, my hero, my king. I could for the first time in my life, feel his love. I could see finally, why he died, what it meant, and what his plan for me was. Indeed it was fast, but I felt that how much thought could something so powerful need? I no longer wanted to complicate what the love of Jesus Christ meant. I think that our generation tends to add so much onto the love of Jesus Christs heart that we often forget who he really is.

I then took another hit, and my faith took the same blow as a result. My mom dropped the news on me, that my step dad, who has influenced me greatly along my journey in life was divorcing her and we were moving back to Canada. With the move back to Canada, I felt like I was losing so much. All of my friendships and relationships were at risk. This meant my third high school, and it only further proved my point and made my fear that much more relevant - people always leave. I spent the summer the best way I know how with my friends from the states. It was fantastic, but it was only a band aid for the wounds that were constantly being caused by me and my mothers terrible relationship. She has been there for me through everything, in almost every aspect of my life, except personally. She had no idea of my morals, or that I've always been clean and abstained from any drugs, alcohol, tobacco, or the temptation of sex. I was proud of myself, but knowing that my own mother - the one person in this world that claimed to be rooting for me in my life, wasn't, because she took no interest in my life. This caused me to have one of the worst family lives I could imagine, given my childhood.

It's now September of that year, I'm at a new school. I don't know anyone. I'm feeling scared, alone. I'm dealing with everything inside me, all by myself. The meaningless relationships and friendships that I'd had up until this point, had still left me feeling empty. I hated my classes. I hated everyone. My life was so full of hate, that was seemingly all that I knew. A few days into the semester, I still know almost nobody, and I see a sign. A guidance from God. In the form of one of my fellow classmates: Lindsay Parkhill. She asked me: "Do you believe in God?" To which I replied: "I haven't really given where I stand religiously much thought lately, why do you ask?" She then followed to convince me to give her church a chance. For two weeks, she got stood up, because I was afraid of her, the church which I knew I would feel so lost inside, and everyone else that would be in attendance. One week, I finally gave in to her persistence, and attended. It was life changing. The way Tracy explained God's love to me. The way everyone was so accepting. It moved me in a way that I didn't think possible. This was the night that I found God. This night was the night that I accepted Jesus as my Lord and Saviour. This night, was the night that I was saved.

Lindsay Parkhill: I owe you everything that I have, everything that I am. I am forever in debt to you for playing such a huge role in my salvation. In me finding the true meaning of the grace and love of God. Since the day that you convinced me to come to church with you, you've become more to me then just my friend, or even my best friend. You're family. You're like my more mature little sister. I admire the way you show such respect and admiration for everyone, I admire your faith. Even if it may be a little weak at some times, I'm always here for you. No matter what you need. I love you. Thank you, for everything that you've done for me, everything that you are. Just, thank you.